The Importance Of Self-Care: Why You Deserve To Prioritize Yourself
I didn’t realize how badly I needed self-care until my body and mind both said, “Enough.”
As a chef and business owner in New York City, managing teams across the globe, my daily life is a mix of exhilarating wins and crushing disappointments. I’ve learned to navigate the thrill of success alongside the sting of setbacks. But the constant push eventually caught up with me.
Twice, burnout brought me to my knees. My passion dimmed, my energy vanished, and my health crumbled. I was pouring everything into my work and the people around me, and leaving nothing for myself. That’s when I learned the truth: you can’t pour from an empty cup.
Self-care isn’t selfish, indulgent, or optional. It’s the foundation of a balanced, healthy, and joyful life.
What Is Self-Care?
At its heart, self-care is about taking intentional actions to support your mental, physical, and emotional well-being.
It’s not just bubble baths and spa days (though those can be wonderful). It’s recognizing your needs and meeting them (consistently) in ways that restore your energy, lift your mood, and strengthen your resilience.
For some, self-care is a morning walk in fresh air. For others, it’s a nourishing meal, a deep conversation, or simply five minutes alone with a cup of tea.
The beauty is: self-care is personal. And now that I’m intentional about building a well-balanced life, I’ve found it’s actually a fun journey of rediscovering myself.
Why Self-Care Matters
1. It Prevents Burnout
When I ignored my limits, I hit burnout hard. Twice.
Now, I treat my boundaries like sacred space. Consistent self-care keeps me from slipping back into that dark place. It’s the fuel that helps me show up fully in my work, relationships, and life. I’ve learned the hard way: it’s not worth it if I gain everything and lose myself.
2. It Supports Physical Health
Rest, movement, nourishing food, and quality sleep aren’t indulgences; they’re survival essentials. Taking care of your body lowers stress hormones, supports your immune system, and gives you the stamina to live well.
In 2023, I dealt with severe fibroids and back pain — two separate issues that caused enough suffering to compromise my lifestyle. In hindsight, it was a valuable (and painful) lesson: health is wealth. Without it, nothing else matters.
3. It Builds Emotional Resilience
Life will always have its storms. But when you’re grounded in self-care, you can face them with more calm and clarity. Even the smallest rituals (a mindful breath, a walk in nature, a warm shower at the end of a long day) can steady your mind.
4. It Improves Relationships
You can’t be patient, kind, or present for others if you’re running on empty. When you care for yourself first, you bring better energy into every connection. We don’t need to be negative all the time around our loved ones. They are not your emotional outlet. I am not saying we should be our own island and block everyone out but trust me, it’s much more pleasant for everyone involves when we learn how to care for ourselves from inside out. We can certainly share our feelings but I don’t believe we should not vomit and overload our feelings to anyone. Trust me, this again, I have learned it from many mistakes I have made.
Simple Ways to Practice Self-Care
- Step outside for fresh air and sunlight, even if only for five minutes.
- Begin your morning slowly, without rushing or checking your phone immediately. (This one’s still hard for me, but I’m trying!)
- Cook yourself a meal that makes you feel good inside and out.
- Move your body in ways you enjoy, not as punishment. (If the gym isn’t your thing, explore other activities: wall yoga, basketball, jump rope, tai chi. Do what feels right for YOU, not what others say you “should” do.)
- Schedule real downtime: no emails, no guilt, just you. (Trust me, the world won’t fall apart if you take a 30-minute break.)
- Speak to yourself with the same kindness you offer others. If you don’t know how yet, start small: “I’m grateful for you today.”
My “Small Pockets of Joy”
When I first decided to take better care of myself, I didn’t know what made me happy. It’s a sad fact. I had no idea! I had been so focused on serving others that I’d forgotten how to serve myself.
So, I took the courage to make a small step to get to know myself again. Little by little, I discovered what filled me up. Now, I keep a list, my Small Pockets of Joy, to remind me of the things that bring me back to life. For example:
- Watching period dramas like Downton Abbey, War & Peace (oh, how James Norton moves me), and Sense and Sensibility. They transport me to another world.
- Sweating it out in the sauna and wishing I could do this more often.
- Savoring a fragrant cup of jasmine or oolong tea in the morning (And by the way, expensive tea doesn’t always mean better, at least not for my taste.)
- A bite of 72% dark chocolate or put it into a super moist and guilt free chocolate chip cookies.
- Watching Bernard Haitink smile while conducting Beethoven’s No. 7 on DW Classical (sometimes on repeat).
- Cooking comfort Thai food at home like Kanom Jean Nahm Ngiaw, Sator with shrimpaste and shrimp, Ghang Som or Ghan Kanoon. Oh sooooo comforting, like a hug and the soothing times of my carefree childhood.
Just writing this list feels like therapy. It’s proof that I’ve taken the time to know myself again, to be my own friend, not a stranger.
And that’s huge. My list might look ridiculous to someone else, but who cares? It’s mine. That’s the power of self-care, it’s about what fills you up, not what anyone else thinks.
And maybe that’s my last and most important lesson: draw boundaries.
Final Thoughts
Self-care isn’t a luxury, it’s a lifeline. By making space for rest, reflection, and renewal, you create a stronger, healthier foundation for yourself and those you love.
So here’s my invitation to you: write your own “Small Pockets of Joy” list today. Keep it somewhere visible. The next time life feels heavy, choose something from that list and give yourself permission to feel joy, without guilt.
And if your page is blank right now, that’s okay. Take your time. One day, you’ll have the courage to add to it.
In fact, don’t wait for life to break you down first. Maybe this is the new way forward: to find your little pocket of joy as an everyday practice, rain or shine.
Because you matter. And your well-being matters even more.
I’d love so much to hear from you and if you want to share your tips on self care, I am all ears.
